Character Sheet: Brutus Maximus

And now, a villain by Ryuu – Brutus Maximus [Jul. 6, 2006]

Name: Brutus Maximus
Nick-Name: (none)
Gender: Male
Age: No one is really sure how old Stalfos are...
Height: Normal: 5'9" w/ Armor: 6'6"
Weight: Normal: 45 lbs. w/ Armor: 244 lbs.

Brutus Maximus as a name is silly in an almost cartoonish way, so how bad it is really depends on how it fits the setting – which I’m going to say it really doesn’t.

I know, they’re real names – like the famous Marcus Junius Brutus (friend to Caesar, for those of you who don’t know) and Maximus of Hispania (No history lesson, here, I was just looking for someone with that name, since I could only think “Gluteus Maximus”).

Because they’re real names, I’m going to make this post even longer by going through name etymology! Oh boy!

Brutus is, of course, Latin, being Roman.

Now, when I looked up its meaning, I had to check my sources. The source I trust most frequently (Behind the Name) says it means heavy.

Other sources say: dull, stupid; heavy, slow, foolish; and coarse, oafish.

…this may be the Shakespeare talking, but I’m not terribly pleased with those meanings. I didn’t love Brutus, but I had some fondness for him. And, hey, I hate Julius Caesar. Then again, I know that’s the Shakespeare talking. I hardly know anything historic about him.

Maximus has a much more set meaning. It simply means The Greatest .

…this does create a rather hilarious name, though, depending on the meaning of Brutus. The Greatest Oaf. Hah. Etymology is fun.

Moving on, I will be looking out for why his armor adds six inches of height. If it adds a bunch of weird shit on the top of his head, then I’m going to say right now that it doesn’t count.

I did the math for what a real skeleton would weigh around that height, since skeletons are roughly 14% the weight of a body. It came out around 23 pounds. I honestly don’t think a magical skeleton creature should weigh so little, just because the skeleton is all the support they have. So… I’ll accept the weight as is, tenuously.

Physical Description (body):
Though Stalfos are just skeletons, Brutus has some marks that show individualism... mainly battle damage, but it's still noteworthy. Brutus's bottom right rib is cracked and second-to-bottom left rib is missing. His skull has the most uniqueness to it - in the right eye socket, a black orb is firmly placed like an eyeball. On the black orb is a red, horizontally stretched diamond-shape. It seems that the red part is what he sees with. The left eye socket has an orb as well, but it's all black. A large, slightly curved vertical gash tears on the left side of his skull from the forehead, across the eye, to the cheekbone. His lower right canine tooth is missing, as well as both his premolars on the left side. On the back of his head, he has a tall metal rod that's about 6 inches long. Out of this rod comes a bunch of black hair

I’m actually glad that this character has something to make him less generic. I really wish that he’d tried doing more of that with Domi. It does bother me, though, that he specifically says Brutus has individualism from other Stalfos. First, it implies that other Stalfos do just look the same. For games, it’s fine for battle fodder, but if the character has some prevalence, that character looks clearly different.

Second, it isn’t necessary. Just describe the damn character’s appearance and stop saying how unique he is. I’m not buying it if you don’t actually show it. Minor details are nice, but the skull has the only larger differences – what about stoutness of skeletal frame? Hell, if the character was well written enough (unlikely with Ryuu, but a lady can hope), a person could even get away with some sort of minotaur-like skeleton. Though, a Greek name would have worked better, for that.

Physical Description (apparel)(normal):
Over his hands and forearms are brick red gauntlets with plates of metal on the backs of them for protection. They look too big for him, but they don't fall off like they're defying physics. His feet and shins are covered with loose brick-red brown boots with armor on the shins and the top of the feet. Again, they don't fall off of him, defying physics. Over his pelvis and the upper half of his femurs is a brick-red skirt, covered in armor plating. His shoulders hold metal plates that protect them.

I think Ryuu’s mixed up gauntlets and bracers (used because the word is more common than vambrace), again. Gauntlets are armor for the hands and do not often cover much past the wrist. Bracers cover the forearms. Now, a person could – and often did, in full suits of armor – wear both. However, they are two separate pieces.

My other big problem with this is the “they don't fall off like they're defying physics” part. The repetition of the whole phrase is irritating (the second time, at least, could have been restricted to “they don’t fall off,” if not both of them, outright). It’s also unnecessary – despite the fact that they would most likely fall off in a normal setting, Zelda is not a normal setting and there is some suspension of disbelief already in place.

If he’s wearing the pieces of armor, I’m probably not going to assume they’re going to fall off. Though, really, wearing oversized armor isn’t a reasonable thing to do, anyway, if one can possibly help it.

Physical Description (apparel)(armor):
When wearing this armor, Brutus' arms, legs, and torso are completely made out of greenish-blue energy. His head remains the same.
The torso piece is thick and is all one piece. It breaks up as it goes down, looking like metal ribs. The shoulder panels are large and round. The gauntlets have sectioned fingers and wrists, for there is no cloth - just metal. The skirt of metal is in long panels. The boots are heavy, huge, and sectioned at the ankle. The whole armor set is a deep blue color.

What is it made out of or what enchantments are on it that his body lights up with such energy?

Also, for a character with the supposed mark of individuality, I would have thought his armor would have been something besides an unidentifiable blue material used for the armor and garments of other skeletal baddies from Legend of Zelda.

At least there’s some differentiation for what his armor looks like, compared to the Stalfos that appear to wear tattered blue jean shorts… And, hey, at least it’s not red like everything else Ryuu describes.

Physical Description (weapons):
Normal:
A simple long sword with a sandy-colored handle and a sharp blade.

Armor:
A massive sword as long as Brutus is tall. It is 90% blade and 10% handle. The blade is heavy, but not the sharpest in the world. Its more dulled blade makes slashes more apt to tear than cut. This makes attacks much more painful, but maybe less damaging. However, the weight of the sword can compensate for that.

I can’t help but wonder how such a sword is properly balanced, with a 7.8 inch handle and a heavy 70.2 inch blade. I’m assuming that means the blade is heavier than usual, because a blade that long would already have a fair amount of weight to it.

A balanced sword is not always properly balanced at the crossguard (as swords like rapiers tend to be). Balance is different depending on the sword, but works with the swordsman to fit combat. Now, obviously, a long sword like that doesn’t do any work with thrusting, so the blade would be heavier than the handle to aid in swinging.

The weight of the blade can carry through swings. However, if unbalanced, it could prove too heavy near the end and pull the swordsman off balance, even if only slightly. A second spent in recovery time could be all it takes for an opponent to get past your defenses. Luckily he has no flesh to bleed from.

At 70 inches, it is longer than any sword blade I am familiar with – in my knowledge of swords, I don’t recall any sword having a blade longer than 51 inches. However, this does put the blade squarely into the category of swords that would need two hands to wield it. Eight inches for a handle does not comfortably allow for this, and using a blade nearly as tall as you, and heavier than a blade should be (which is not a good thing, by the way; swords are not meant to be too heavy, despite popular belief) with one hand sounds nothing short of foolish.

Looks most Like: A customized stalfos.
Image: (none)

You know, if it doesn’t apply (and since you’re supposedly trying to be more original), why would you put the “Looks most Like” field in? Ryuu stated that the field was optional. This being so, does he need to say this? Are stalfos like cars that can be bizarrely customized, and most stalfos are just the boring factory model?

If necessary for originality, treat the stalfos like a race in and of themselves.

Personality: He may be a stalfos, and he may be a member of an army of darkness, but he's not completely... "overly evil". He's an honorable fighter in certain respects (such as, he won't hit an opponent if they're down, he won't go after women and children that choose not to fight him, etc...). However, he is fully aware he's on the "evil" side and he can get hot-headed a bit too easily.

This little passage hits on my biggest pet peeve in bad (nay, abominable!) writing.

Guys on the evil side do not commonly think of themselves as evil. They may recognize their opponents as believing them to be evil, but that’s different from honestly believing themselves to be evil. That’s petty, childish writing that fails to understand that so-called evil people have motives, principles, and values.

If Brutus is an honorable character that doesn’t attack opponents unfairly, why would he consider himself evil, or consider the side he’s on to be the evil side?

Why is he on that side, then? I even read the history just now, again, and I still can’t figure it out. There’s no motivation beyond “I like this guy.” Agh. We’ll expand on this bullshit when we get to it.

Know that I have no problem with noble villains – but they can’t consider themselves evil, because that’s just stupid. I’m not going to be nice about it – it doesn’t deserve me being nice about it.

Power(s): If broken apart, Brutus can come back together again after a short while.
Upside to Power(s): Can keep fighting for longer.
Downside to Power(s): It's not immediate, so his head is left unprotected for a while, being completely defenseless.

As far as game powers translated into role-playing goes, this doesn’t appear to be quite so bad of an idea. I’d have to see how it works out in an actual role-play to make a more thorough judgment, though. While it doesn’t seem like a bad idea, I can see this being abused or poorly executed as well.

Strengths: Great fighter and even honorable for a warrior of darkness.
Weaknesses: Can sometimes get so caught up in his strikes that he may not see a counter-strike or even an evasion until his combo is done - this leaves him open if the opponent avoided him earlier on. His skull is his major weakness. Destroy the skull, and he's dead.

I can’t lie – I really don’t like seeing ‘combo’ used outside of video games. It feels… not quite anachronistic, but something like it. Also, combined with his sword, he seems like he’d actually be verging on being an easy fight if his opponent could use speed and agility to his or her benefit.

Again, I’m going to throw it out there: Ryuu does not appear to understand that it is not shocking for ‘evil’ people to have virtues, values, and principles. This is probably why he hit on one of my big pet peeves with bad writing. Next, all villains will be ugly, or get uglier the more evil they get (I’m looking at you, J.K. Rowling. You should know better).

History:
After Gravitor returned from the outside dimension where he gained his power, he raised an army of Stalfos, ReDeads, Poes, and others. Among those was Brutus, a Stalfos who had been defeated in the Forest Temple by Link himself. At first, he doubted Gravitor's power... but once he saw one of his own kind get ground to dust by this new dark lord, he knew his place and even admired the man.

As strange as it may sound, Brutus started to take a liking to Gravitor for he could take on the castle's entire army - at least all that came to fight him. Brutus was also overjoyed when he was to ride on horseback by this man on the initial strike. Though the Hylian defenses were strong, they did not get to destroy Brutus, but their weapons snapped off one of his ribs permanently - as well as causing a large slash in his skull and cracking a second rib. That alone makes him constantly be reminded of his limited strength. Feeling like he could be vulnerable at any moment, Brutus now strives to be a Stalfos General, where he'll be greatly protected and still be able to kick butt. . . Until then, he tends to hide and seek out his next challenge. His victories are considered credits to him so he may have merit with Gravitor.

I honestly don’t get his motive, if he’s so honorable. Does he honor strength as a virtue – as the highest virtue? No, that wouldn’t make sense. He ‘knows’ he’s on the evil side. Of course, he seems to be a bit fearful of his own mortality – ironically. Maybe he’s just something of a coward and fears death at the hand of his master, like some craven.

Of course, cowardice is not an honorable virtue, neither is it a sign of strength.

I have a hard time understanding how this cretin is supposed to make sense. That’s a shame, though, because I can see a few ways to spruce him up to make him more understandable and, if not likeable, at least pitiable to the compassionate heroes/protagonists.

Extra: Brutus does not like defeat, so if he loses a battle, he will go so far as to train himself for the rematch he sets himself to.

RPG Style: Zelda RP

To be perfectly honest, I wish I could give this a one, just for the “honorable but knows he’s evil” bullshit, but that’s a little too biased, even for me.

Verdict: I’ll give this a 4/10.

Overall, I found the weapon a little too ridiculous, and the character sheet said he had the mark of individualism, but there was very little that I saw, besides him having a personality. And, even then, the stalfos creatures in the canyon for Majora’s Mask had twice as much personality in a single scene.

However, that’s not to say the sheet isn’t salvageable. For a person like Ryuu, I have to admit I was dreading reading anything about villains. He’s at least trying to make them more than just flat baddies. He doesn’t seem to understand that villains are people to, which is unfortunate, but in a lot of media, villains get the short end of the stick. Evil is evil and that’s all we apparently need to know.

It’s a sad state of affairs, all around.